I was out to eat with some of my sister's friends. There were married couples with single ladies so it's not surprising when the "how to's" for "I Do" came up. I can't recall the guy's name but when asked how do you find a man to marry, he said something so profound that it stayed with me since. He said that your vision for your life should fit inside of his vision for his life, because you have to submit to him. When he said this it clicked a lot of things together for me and made more sense of why my last relationship failed. This man explained that it would be impossible for you to go forward together as a couple when your dreams are greater than his dreams. Either you will end up emasculating him throughout your relationship or you will start to hold yourself back from your dreams so as not to outgrow the man you want to be with.
When he said this, I started to see myself with my ex. Continually trying to push him towards bigger dreams while stinting my own growth. So our relationship was doomed even before infidelity was revealed. I wish I had known this from the beginning. But God has a way of teaching you the things you don't know in order to prepare you. So, I do believe I am still being prepared. For what I don't know. I just know I will keep focusing on my dreams and one day God will send me a man that my dreams can fit inside of. Because I am learning daily that it takes much more than feelings and desire to have a successful relationship.